Friday, October 16, 2009
21 days...3 weeks until we take all that I have done in the past 12 months and hit the road in Panama City Beach.
30, 240 minutes
1, 815, 104 seconds
Why the specific breakdown? Because now time is critical. How I spend these next 3 weeks makes a lot of difference. I am exhausted. I think my body is just saying enough already. I am so ready for taper you have no idea!! My trainer gave me two days off this week because I told him the only thing I wanted to do is sleep.
This weekend should be the final long ride and long run before the race. There are alot of things I need to fine tune this weekend like...making the final decision on what I am going to wear, the final determination of nutrition for the run etc. My mental training is also very important now. I have been having dreams that I am late for the finish line and I don't know how to change what I dream. I am trying very hard to be positive but we all know this is going to be an uphill battle.
When I left Amelia Island, I was in the car with my husband after the race and I started to cry. It was the very FIRST time in my life that DEEP DOWN I felt I could complete Ironman. I walked off that course feeling like I had more gas in the tank if I had to continue (but honestly...I was glad as hell I was headed to an ice bath and a glass of wine). It was a moment I wish I could reach out and capture again.
Taper madness I guess is starting early with me. I remember how I was last year. I went crazy cleaning the house and such but this year it is different. I am really focused on this race. Maybe too focused but I am trying to remind myself that this is a hobby and its suppose to be fun.
The one thing that does bring me a sense of peace is just putting the race in God's hands. I am not outwardly religious...I believe you could call me deeply spiritual. I believe that, in the end, he will decide as long as I put out 110% of me and my effort. I just gotta go out there and put it all on the course. As my husband told me "Go out there honey and give it everything you got...we will be there to sponge up what's left of you". Kind of a gross metaphor...but it works :)