Welcome to the crazy mind of Melissa. Go ahead, have a seat, kick back and watch the insanity unfold...ohh...and have you met my "friend"....his name is ED.
No..."ED" is not a person. No...it doesn't stand for the issue that Viagra can remedy. "ED" is what I call my desire for food. "ED" stands for Eating Disorder.
"ED" appears about 2 months into a weight loss program and around the 10 to 15 pound weight loss mark. He rears his ugly head and tries to be the stumbling block to keep me from my goals and dreams. "ED" is...well....he's a real bastard!!
"ED" acts like your friend. Food can be that ya know. " ED" is there in the middle of the night when all that seems to be the right thing to do is pound down ice cream and chips. "ED" is the one who tells you one bite is fine...but it's never one bite...its always 12 or 14. " ED" is the guy who says "Ill start tomorrow...Ill be good next week ... or....I like myself this size."
"ED" doesn't belong at a triathlon, bike trainer session, boot camp workout or most importantly...ED doesn't belong in my head. "ED" really needs to take a hike or have an unfortunate accident.
I am currently hanging on by a thread with my weight loss. I stayed the same on the scale but in my peripheral vision, I can see "ED" standing in the shadows with a bag of M&M's and a good excuse. There are times that ANY excuse will do to consume too much food....at least in my world.
So...now that you know "ED" and he is out there for the world to see, it's easier for me to put him in the boxing ring and give him a good pummeling. Or better yet...for the triathletes...I say we put him in an Ironman with no body glide!!
Those are my strange ramblings for the day...feel free to opine if you so desire....I would love to hear from those who battle anything from negative thoughts when you race to dealing with an eating disorder. How do you battle your demons?